World’s Weirdest Tie

Posted: March 30, 2013 in Uncategorized
Tags: , , , ,

A story about a tie. Note – it is critical to look at the accompanying photo! Dinosaur tie

The weirdest tie I have ever owned came about because a student many years ago took exception with my wardrobe sense. As a result of being a mercy case, I got given two ties. One is unremarkable. The other is anything but…

In case you can’t see the pic (or to add to your amusement or horror) I’ll briefly describe what’s going on:

There are two dinosaurs. At the bottom of the tie is a dinosaur, wearing clothes (including a green check shirt, a v-neck pullover and a matching brown (some might call it gold) jacket and tie). This self-respecting dinosaur (he has the belt to prove it) is dreaming of a silver dinosaur who is, by all appearances, naked. I’m guessing it is a ‘he’ by the thrust of his chin – the silver dinosaur might well be female… who knows?

I don’t wear this tie very often, but always wear it, at least once a year, when I have a new Year 7 class. Having explained how weird the tie is, I go on to get the boys to take it a step further. I ask them to imagine the scenario where there is a young tie designer, who goes in to his or her boss and says:

Hey, I know it might sound a bit weird, but stay with me here. I’m thinking of a tie… a new tie. Not just any tie! On this one, we could have, like, a dinosaur, wearing clothes… no no… stay with me here… dreaming of a silver dinosaur! Naked? Why not. Yeah, I know… it just HAS to be done!!

As you might imagine, it sparks a lot of conversation. Years ago, I read Margaret Atwood’s Oryx and Crake. With failing memory, I might be mistaken, but I recall a moment where there was discussion that if we were to have another world war, we would never be able to recover, primarily because having destroyed all of our metals via the weapon blasts, those remaining would be so deep in the earth that they would be beyond our ability to source them.

So I wondered about this tie and I think that it has solved the riddle of the dinosaurs. The dinosaurs, far from being the slow moving and ponderous beasts of the 19th Century, or the fast, cunning creatures of the late 20th, were actually creatures of society. They developed cities and culture, to the point where they were wearing clothes at the height of their civilisation.

Unfortunately these advances came at a price – a terrible price. The dinosaurs could not escape their reptilian roots and developed devastating weapons of war. It was inevitable that the day would come, and it did. The destructive blast wiped out the last 5 million years of their culture, razing it from the historical record. Thus humanity would believe that they were only predatory beasts and plant eaters…

Fortunately, we have this tie, to help us put these pieces back today…

Thanks A.G. wherever you are. I don’t wear it often, but I still have that tie today!

  1. words4jp says:

    this a great tie – my thought? the bottom dino is wearing the ‘chic’ clothes to conform to society – but in his mind he sees himself as the true dino ‘she’ is. – one could flip the subjects around don’t you think? 🙂

  2. This is glorious – I would wear the heck out of this tie. A fully clothed, cold-blooded reptile? We got ourselves a rebel, ladies and gentlemen.

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